


Kuebiko

by Anonymous



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: AU, Established Relationship, Kid Fic, M/M, Mass Effect 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-17
Updated: 2013-03-17
Packaged: 2017-12-05 14:43:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/724461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The entire galaxy is at stake and James Vega can only think of one person. He just hopes both he and Esteban will make it out alive. For their daughter's sake.</p><p>An AU where James and Esteban have a daughter during Mass Effect 3, and have to hide their relationship from the rest of the Normandy crew.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kuebiko

**Author's Note:**

> Kuebiko is defined by dictionaryofobscuresorrows on tumblr as a state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless violence, which force you to revise your image of what can happen in this world—mending the fences of your expectations, weeding out all unwelcome and invasive truths, cultivating the perennial good that’s buried under the surface, and propping yourself up like an old scarecrow, who’s bursting at the seams but powerless to do anything but stand there and watch.
> 
> There is too much angst in this for something that began as a cracky "lol what if Vega and Cortez were married in me3?" Unfortunately it quickly turned into a way too serious "omg what if Vega and Cortez were married during me3?????" that turned into... this. It ignores most non-me3 canon, and honestly a lot of me3 canon. For instance, the beginning of the game takes place in Mexico City not Vancouver. Oh, and they're not actually married.
> 
> Warning for descriptions of violence (including referenced violence to children) on par with canon.

James Vega is sitting in the pilot seat of the Kodiak, trying futilely to contact the Normandy. He was _so_ not the right choice for this, and would have told the Commander so if she weren’t so busy making eyes at the asari and flirting with Alenko.

 _Fuck it,_ he thinks, and tries to contact Esteban’s ship. Esteban was asked to ferry some diplomat or another to the Citadel, and if there’s a God, he’s still in Citadel space.

“SSV Toronto. Cortez.”

James lets out a ragged breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “It’s James. Where are you?”

“Hey,” Esteban says, softly now. Privately. “I thought we agreed I’d call you when I landed on Earth.”

“Where are you?” James repeats, because it’s important. If they’re in Sol then… he’s probably too late.

“We’re still docked on the Citadel. ETD one hour.” James closes his eyes and thanks every god he can think of.

“Stay there.”

“James, what’s—”

“Have you heard about what’s happened to Earth?” James can’t imagine that he didn’t. Unless… unless Earth’s completely decimated already.

“Uh,” Esteban says, caught off guard. “Comms have gone down. We’ve been unable to get in contact with Earth. It’s part of the reason our departure was delayed. James,” he says. “What is going on?”

“The Reapers invaded Sol. They attacked Earth before we even realized they were in the system.”

James hears Esteban curse under his breath, even with the shitty connection. “Where are you? Where’s Josefina? Is she okay?”

“She’s fine. She’s with my uncle. I’m on the Normandy,” James says. That’s a slight lie. He’s on Mars. But he’s _stationed_ on the Normandy and he figures semantics aren’t the issue.

Esteban takes a deep breath, and lets it out slowly. “I’m coming with you.”

“What?”

“The Normandy can pick me up next time it docks on the Citadel. I’ll get a transfer.”

“Like hell you will.”

“I’m not letting you go on a suicide mission alone.”

“It’s not a suicide mission.”

“It’s _Commander Shepard_ and the _Reapers_. It’s a suicide mission.”

“Alright, fine. So what if it is a suicide mission? What about José? What’s gonna happen to her if both her dads die?”

“I’m not letting you go on a suicide mission alone,” Esteban says.

James is quiet for a minute. He looks out at the oncoming storm, and thinks about José and Esteban. He wants them to be okay. He wants them to be safe. But Esteban’s military, through and through, and made more of stubborn than he is of bone. Esteban’s not asking, he’s telling.

“Married couples aren’t allowed to serve on the same vessel,” James points out, but it’s weak.

“We’re not married yet,” Esteban says triumphantly.

 

“Esteban,” James says flatly. It’s barely after Mars, and yet there he is. “What are you doing here?”

Esteban shrugs. “Working.”

Shepard looks between them and asks, “You two know each other?”

“I was doing a stint on Fehl Prime when Mr. Vega was stationed there,” Esteban says. His eyes are dangerous, daring James to contradict him.

“Yeah,” James says, not breaking eye contact with Esteban. “We met up on Earth a couple years ago. We’re friends.”

“I wouldn’t go _that_ far,” Esteban says, but his eyes are soft.

 

“ _Mr_. Vega?” James teases, coming up beside him at the terminal. His voice is low so the other soldiers milling around the shuttle bay can’t hear him. “I’m over here calling you Esteban, and you use Mr. Vega? I’m hurt.”

Esteban’s lips turn down in the way that means he’s fighting off a smile. James always has a way of making him laugh. “Just trying to establish distance. I wouldn’t be surprised if you started blabbing about Josefina to anyone who will listen.”

“Well,” James says guiltily.

“You didn’t.” Esteban’s actually smiling now though, and James can’t help but grin back.

“Just Westmoreland and Campbell! They’re bored guarding that door all day. I was doing them a favor.”

“Always so generous, James,” Esteban says in that mix of sarcasm and fondness that he’s perfected over the years.

James is a little more than fond of that tone himself.

He’s about to say something else when Esteban’s eyes catch something over James’ shoulder and turn sharp. “I saw what you did to the Kodiak, Mr. Vega,” he says, the smile gone from his face and along with it their quiet moment. “Don’t do it again.” James knows what everyone else is hearing, “Fuck up my ship again and I’ll fuck you up,” but he also knows what Esteban really means, “Get yourself hurt and I’ll fuck you up worse.”

“Yeah, yeah,” James says and knows that while everyone else hears a flippant retort, Esteban will hear the sincerity he’s not allowed to show. “Hey, Commander,” he says as he passes by her.

 

James is on the Presidium. He should really be doing something, looking at the sites, or pissing on statues, but all he can do is look at the Citadel and think about his kid.

It’s not fair that these people get to be safe and secure, when James’ kid, his _hija,_ could be dead. The Presidium is eerily calm, not prepared at all for war, and James has tried to pull every string he can to get his daughter here.

They all say the same thing: she may not even be alive; we’re not sending ships into the Sol system; there’s more of a chance she would die trying to escape than staying where she is.

Shepard finds him an hour or so later and somehow she ends up asking, “So you still want to go back to Earth?”

“Hell yeah. But you were right. So was Anderson. We can’t stop them alone.” He pauses and because it’s all he’s been able to think about all day, he says, “It’s just hard. My daughter’s on Earth.”

Shepard keeps nodding for a full five seconds before her head snaps toward him. “You have a daughter? _You_?”

“Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up.”

“I’m just surprised. What’s her name?”

“Josefina. I call her José. She’ll be turning three in a couple months.”

“And she’s on Earth?”

“Yeah. We live outside of Mexico City. And well, you saw Mexico City.”

“Do you think she’s still alive?” It hurts more coming from her than he expected it to.

“She has to be,” he says, and goes back to finding out the answer to that question. 

 

He gets a shitty audio message from Tío Emilio and lets out a deep breath. He finds Esteban working beneath the Kodiak, and kicks his leg urgently to get his attention.

“What the hell,” Esteban starts, but James says, “She’s alive,” and he goes silent. After a moment, Esteban hooks his foot around James’ ankle, and says, “Stay.”

“Wasn’t going anywhere.” James sits down, leaning against the Kodiak. Esteban rolls out from underneath like James expected him to and sits beside him. James takes Esteban’s hand in his own, and they stay that way, hidden behind the Kodiak until Shepard comes bursting out the elevator, Vakarian at her heels like a shadow.

 

It’s José’s birthday. It’s James’ kid’s goddamn _birthday_ and her parents aren’t even there. He’s been in a bad mood all day, beating the shit out of a punching bag. The rest of the crew’s been giving him a wide berth; even Esteban has just been glancing worried looks his way.

Looks that stopped about an hour ago when Esteban began watching video messages of Josefina and Tío Emilio. They’re old because there’s not a strong enough connection on Earth to send out civilian messages, but her face coupled with the knowledge that somewhere she’s turning three without them there is upsetting enough.

James knows the tight set of Esteban’s shoulders means he’s crying, and James wants to go over there and comfort him, but he _can’t_ because they have to keep up this goddamn fucking ruse so _both_ of them have the chance to die.

His punches become a bit more vicious.

Of course, that’s when the elevator opens, and Shepard pops out. She makes a point of talking to both him and Esteban whenever she comes down here, so it’s no surprise when he hears them talking.

“Your niece?” she asks.

Out of the corner of his eye, James can see Esteban shake his head. “I’m an only child. She’s my daughter.” _Edging into dangerous territory there, Esteban,_ James thinks. He’s suddenly glad he never showed Shepard pictures of José, the way he’s shown everyone else pictures of her.

“I didn’t realize you had one. What’s her name?”

“Josefina.” And, _fuck_.

“Huh,” Shepard says. “Your daughter has the same name as James’.”

Esteban chuckles, but James hears the nervous quality to it. “We laughed when we found out.”

They laughed when they found out they were going to have a kid. Obviously they knew beforehand, because they couldn’t exactly have an accidental lab baby. It hadn’t really sunk in though until they got a completely bland message on their terminal that made both of them laugh every time they caught the other’s eye for the following week.

_“Lab subject 104456 is developing at a normal rate and is expected to be at full term in 35 weeks and two days.”_

Lab subject 104456.

Their daughter.

James memorized the numbers, and time found him and Esteban whispering them to each other in the night like they couldn’t believe it actually happened. James tapped out the numbers in fits of nervous energy. Esteban would write them on James’ skin like a tattoo.

On his rib cage, next to his heart, James tattooed the numbers permanently.

 

“So you and Cortez, hm?” Vakarian asks. Or, James thinks he asks; he’s never been good with turian intonation.

“Don’t know what you’re talking about, Scars,” he says instead. He finds pretty quickly though that it’s not just Garrus who knows.

As it turns out, it’s pretty hard to keep a secret from the ship’s AI. Who knew, right? And when that AI is dating the pilot, it’s inevitable that he also finds out.

And Doc must have a pretty good nose for secrets, because she slips him a datapad sometime after Tuchanka. He doesn’t even realize she’s given it to him until he gets back to the shuttle bay, and his eyes widen when he realizes what’s on it: updates from his uncle that haven’t been able to get to him. There’s even a vid dated two days ago showing a very much aliveand miraculously bright-eyed Josefina that he shows Esteban at the first opportunity.

(“She needs a haircut,” James says, when Esteban doesn’t say anything.

He breathes out a laugh. “And a bath.”

“First thing when we get back,” promises James.)

James will admit that maybe it’s his and Esteban’s fault Kaidan walked in on them making out in the lounge, but counterpoint: maybe Kaidan shouldn’t have shown up to their poker match early. Actually, James is pretty content with letting the blame lie with Kaidan.

He finds out Tali knows when she slurs, drunk off possibly the only dextro alcohol on the ship, “You’ve both showed me the same picture and said she was your daughter. Bosh’tets.”

“Oh,” James says awkwardly. “Well.” He shuffles out, planning on talking to Esteban because really, one of them should be responsible and he’d like to know if it has to be him.

In fact, by the time they land in London, Shepard’s the only one who _doesn’t_ know.

 

Shepard takes him and Garrus with her to the charge on the Citadel.

“Lola,” he starts, as things have gone from bad to worse and Shepard’s refusing to let them go with her.

“Go, James,” she tells him firmly. “Find your daughter.”

He nods, and looks pointedly away as Garrus tells her under no uncertain terms to come back alive.

They’re silent as the Mako retreats back to the Normandy, Shepard’s absence a noticeable space between them.

 

James has no idea what Shepard did, but something happened to the Mass Relays and all the Reapers are dead.

“Though,” EDI says thoughtfully, “I do not believe they are permanently damaged.”

“Then let’s go back, what’s the holdup?” James demands.

“I don’t know if you noticed, James,” Joker snaps, “but we just crash landed on a planet in the middle of nowhere and our nav systems are down.”

“Then put them back on!”

“‘Put them back on’? _‘Put them back on,’_ are you _kidding_?”

“It is Eden Prime,” says Javik, and the cabin goes quiet.

“Are you sure?” asks Liara.

“Yes,” he says. James doesn’t argue. The guy spent fifty thousand years on Eden Prime. If he says it’s Eden Prime, it’s Eden Prime.

“So, Joker,” Garrus says, speaking up for the first time since Commander Shepard made them leave. “Think that’s enough to get us back?”

“Let’s hope.”

 

James and Esteban leave the rest of the crew to find Shepard; they respect the hell out of her, but Mexico’s a big place and they’ve got a daughter to find. Shepard’s influence, even possibly from beyond the grave, gets them on the next shuttle to Mexico City.

They see it on the news before Kaidan calls them. “She’s alive.”

“We saw on the vids,” James says. Esteban’s a few feet away talking to a soldier with migration records. “What’s her status?”

Kaidan sighs. “She’s stable, but she’s not waking up. Garrus hasn’t left her side since they brought her in.”

Esteban looks like he’s finishing up with the soldier, and James says, “I’ve got to go. Keep me updated.”

“They evacuated children to the North,” Esteban tells him.

“That’s a big place. Anything more specific?”

“That’s what Hernandez is looking up for me now.”

They don’t mention the unspoken “What if she’s not alive?” because she has to be.

They didn’t save the galaxy just to lose the most important thing in it.

 

They find the town Hernandez said she would be slaughtered.

James and Esteban exchange a look, and Esteban slows the car down. On either side of a one-way road are bodies laid out in neat little rows, mostly children. They search, but they don’t see Josefina’s face among the dead. James doesn’t dwell on the severed limbs, or the stories Garrus has told him of the Collector ship.

Up ahead they see a team of six Alliance soldiers. Esteban slows the car to a stop, and it hovers in the air perilously. “What happened here?”

“The Reapers,” a soldier says darkly. “They found out the Alliance was relocating children, and sent in a team of those things--los brutos. Killed the entire fucking town.”

James’ fists clench, and Esteban puts his right hand on James’ left where it’s resting on the center console. James looks up, but Esteban isn’t looking back at him; his eyes are on the soldier. He passes her a picture through the open window. “I know you’ve seen a lot, but have you seen her?”

She stares at it for what seems like an age, but finally shakes her head. “No,” she says, giving the photo back to Esteban. “But that doesn’t mean much.”

“It means she’s not here. Do you know where they might have gone?”

“Santa Ana, maybe,” she says. “Near the border. There's a refugee camp up there.”

“Thank you,” Esteban says, and James manages a “Gracias” himself.

They leave the bodies behind them.

 

“Papá! Papi!” a tiny voice screeches and James turns his head, out of the corner of his eye he sees Esteban do the same.

Before he even knows what he is doing, he’s running towards her, and is on his knees, bundling her into his arms. She hides her tears into his neck, her arms a tight grip around him. “Mija, mija, mija,” he’s repeating like a mantra. Peripherally, he’s aware of Esteban dropping to his knees beside them, reaching out like he’s afraid it’s a trick. José raises her face from James’ neck at the touch, and at the sight of her papi makes grabby hands until she can throw her arms around him too.

Josefina babbles mangled Spanglish to them like when she was the smallest of toddlers, unused to the idea that she was speaking two different languages. She’s crying into the warm space between James’ neck and Esteban’s, her skinny arms around each of them. James reaches to smooth out her knotted hair, his hand knocks into Esteban’s, and they tangle there, a gentle comfort on their daughter’s head.

 

After they’ve all calmed down, James asks her, “Where’s Tío Emilio?” Josefina breaks into a new round of tears, crying, “No sé,” into his shoulder, and James clutches at her, needing the support himself. He looks up wildly at Esteban, who puts the hand not rubbing Josefina’s back on James’ cheek. “Lo siento,” he says. James can barely hear it over José’s sobs, and the blood rushing in his ears.

 

Alliance soldiers point them towards an abandoned, still standing house not that far away they can stay the night in.

It looks empty from the outside, and James knows the Alliance would never send them to a house they hadn’t cleaned out, and the Reapers are all dead, but he’s not taking any chances.

“Stay here with Josefina,” he tells Esteban, drawing his shotgun. James knows Esteban rolled his eyes, but he’s out of practice; James was the one literally walking into hell less than a week ago.

It’s eerie, walking into someone else’s house when they’re not there. It doesn’t even look abandoned, no dust or anything. Everything looks like they just walked out for the day and never came back.

That’s probably what happened.

He wonders if anyone is walking into their house, knocking into the side table by the front door, tripping over the toys littering the floor, seeing the family pictures hanging on the wall.

He voices it when he’s finished sweeping the house, and Esteban asks, “Do you really think our house is still standing?”

“Fuck, I didn’t even think of that.”

Josefina giggles from Esteban’s arms, and he gives James a wry look. “You owe twenty credits to the curse jar.”

“That was mostly for--” Tío Emilio, he wants to finish.

Esteban must sense it because he flips a light switch. “Power’s out.”

“The food in the fridge is bad then,” says James, heading towards the kitchen. “They’ve got a gas oven,” he reports.

“Old school. Does it work?”

He turns one of the dials and a tiny flame flickers to life. “Yeah,” he confirms.

“We have--beans,” Esteban says from the pantry.

“Beans?” Josefina whines as James says, “What, that’s _it_?”

James sees Esteban roll his eyes. “That’s it that’s fresh.”

 

They give Josefina a huge serving during dinner because, “She’s so _skinny_ ,” James says softly over her head that night in bed.

Esteban brushes her hair out of her eyes gently and says, “I know. I almost didn’t recognize her.”

“When we get back to the city we’re having a huge fucking meal.”

“Five courses?” Esteban asks, smiling at James for all his eyes are on Josefina.

“Ten,” James promises.

Esteban looks up at him then, and kisses him, a light brush of lips against lips.

Josefina stirs between them, and James knows that’s their cue to go to sleep themselves but he can’t. He keeps expecting to hear a banshee’s shriek, or see a husk round the corner. He keeps reaching for his gun, and he knows Esteban feels the same way.

“Do you want to talk about Emilio?” asks Esteban, in the quiet of the night. His hand strokes James’ featherlight.

“Yes,” says James. “But not. Not right now.”

“Okay,” he agrees easily.

The silence that stretches on isn’t awkward, but he feels like he has to fill it. “Do you think--He could still be alive, couldn’t he?”

“Of course he could. He knows his way around a gun.”

“Yeah,” James says, squeezing his hand. Hearing it from someone else, hearing it from _Esteban_ makes it seem more possible than when it echoes around in his own mind.

“You should sleep,” Esteban says.

“Right backatcha.”

“You can’t sleep when the sun is out.”

“Alright, alright. Don’t let me sleep that late though.”

“I won’t.”

James drifts off into a thankfully dreamless sleep.

 

He jolts awake when he hears a scream, and is reaching for his shotgun in the split second before he realizes it was his daughter, not a banshee.

He turns to see Esteban pull her into a hug and rock her gently side to side. He’s mumbling comforting words to her that James can only begin to make out when he scooches over to lay a comforting hand on Josefina’s back.

“It’s okay, José,” he says, “it’s okay. We’re here now. We’re not going to let anything happen to you.”

By the time her crying peters out into tiny sniffles and then into nothing at all, the clock tells him it’s four in the morning, and none of them look like they’ll be going back to sleep.

James says, “We should probably be taking off anyway.”

Esteban agrees. “I got a message from Samantha a couple of hours ago. The Commander woke up.”

 

James, Esteban, and Josefina get into London two days after that.

Like Kaidan said, Garrus is beside Shepard’s bed when James and Josefina come in. Shepard’s sitting up, Garrus hovering beside her.

“You look terrible, Shepard,” James says. Then teasingly, “You and Scars match now.”

“Not that ugly,” her voice cracks slightly as she speaks.

“Thanks,” says Garrus, dryly.

“Oh, hey,” James says, settling Josefina on his lap. Since they reunited, she understandably refuses to be more than a foot away from one of her fathers at any given time. “Lola, Scars, this is my daughter, Josefina. José, Commander Shepard and Garrus Vakarian. They’re big softies, don’t worry.”

“Hola,” Josefina says meekly from James’ lap.

“English, José,” James reminds her, “the Commander can’t speak Spanish.”

“Hey,” Shepard says groggily, her eyes focusing on Josefina. “That’s Cortez’s daughter. Wait, are you--”

James’ laugh overpowers Garrus’ quiet chuckle. “The crew figured it out _ages_ ago, Shepard.”

Shepard laughs, and ends up coughing because of it. “Guess I had other things on my mind. I would have figured it out on the SR-1, if Tali and Liara had a kid behind my back.”

“About that,” Garrus starts, but he gives himself away.

“Ass,” Shepard says.

“Language, Shepard,” Esteban reprimands closing the door behind him, impeccable timing that’s saved their asses in combat more times than not showing itself once again. “There are three year olds present. Keep it up and you may have to contribute to the curse jar.”

“Hey, Steve,” she greets. “Am I allowed to have this many visitors?”

He grins. “You’re Commander Shepard, you can do whatever you want.”

“Except curse.”

“Well you could,” James says with a grin, “but then you’d probably end up paying for Josefina to go to college, so you know, I’m cool with whatever.”

There’s not a third chair, so he stands next to James instead. James watches as he turns his smile onto Josefina, and reaches out to take her hand, gently swinging it before letting them both rest warmly on James' thigh. James forgot they can do that now. He forgot he can kiss Esteban, if he wants.

He looks up to find Shepard staring at them with sharp eyes. James doesn't know what his face looks like but he assumes it's soppy. He quickly schools it into something less embarrassing.

“You look like a family,” she says. “I don’t know how I missed it.”

“Like you said, you were busy.” He shrugs. It’s not a big deal; at any rate, he and Esteban were trying to keep it hidden from her. “Besides, you have the rest of her life to be the best aunt ever.”


End file.
